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What's Wrong With Us

from Dispatches From the Well by Fiona Chamness

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lyrics

Let's talk about girls & boys again
Let's talk about jokes about sandwiches & knees
Let's get a little bit ridiculous
Used to be fun when we were little kids

I have a cunt, that's a funny word
All this stuff's pretty funny, let's be stupid, it's funny
Me & my friend we laugh so hard, we
Mess up our stories & we almost fall over

& what's wrong with us laughing
We met when we were 11
& some part of you is always 11
& some part of you is always 19

& some part is always on the attack
Like the demon in back of your head that's always screaming
Girls, Girls, Girls
We're the best of friends, friends, friends

She played Helen Keller in the middle school play
I was her mom & we practiced
Eating lunch with our eyes closed & silent
Couldn't see what we were trying to swallow

Ask me why couldn't Helen Keller drive
This man when the class trip to Washington tried
To make us let him touch our heads with a head massager
& I was like no thanks & the teachers called to us
Girls, Girls, Girls
& we ran to our friends, friends, friends

We dressed in drag, National Pirate Day
Captain Jack Sparrow & Will Turner
I can look a lot like Johnny Depp
Under certain circumstances

They put our picture real big in the yearbook
Even straight girls came for a second look
The closest we got to being Ferris fucking Bueller
Almost except Girls, Girls, Girls
Or close enough, yeah, friends, friends, friends

& she was always braver than me
Or else she couldn't stop herself
From knives & tacks to blacking out
At parties full of wild hyenas

It was there if you knew how to look for it
If you'd asked me I'd've told you it was there
Wanna know why we're so strong & laugh the hardest
Well I don't care

When she told me we were 11
I couldn't make pictures out of the words
When she told her parents we were 19
I hate the things that men do

11 in a church basement
Nobody asked for specifics
& I didn't know what to ask her
So I shut my mouth & hid her blades for years

& they called her whore in the boys' bathroom
They'd never say those things about me
They were busy egging my garage door
I hate the things that you laugh at

Let's talk about cunt, that's a funny word
I hate the things that men do
Let's talk about knees & keeping quiet
I hate the things that you laugh at

No captain going to turn up
I hate the things that men do
So blind & deaf in the Capitol
I hate the things that you laugh at

Let's talk about Girls, Girls, Girls
I hate the things that men do
We mix up our stories, I almost
Fall over some part of you

Let's talk about girls & boys again
Let's get a little bit ridiculous
Used to be fun when we were little kids
The things we tangle up

credits

from Dispatches From the Well, released October 3, 2012

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Fiona Chamness Ann Arbor, Michigan

Fiona Chamness is a poet and songwriter from Ann Arbor, MI. She is coauthor, with Aimée Lê, of Feral Citizens, published in 2011 by Red Beard Press. She belongs to the poetry ensemble Ann Arbor Wordworks and two bands, Helicopter Parents and The Cutting Room Floor. She has performed poetry and music in Ann Arbor, Chicago, Oberlin, Hanover, Boston, St. Louis, Berkeley, and Sevilla, Spain. ... more

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